Oct. 1, 2018 – In recent days we have heard testimony from an alleged victim of sexual assault and a US Supreme Court nominee–vying for an Associate Justice position on our nation’s highest court. What strikes me the most, is the way the hearings have unfolded. If ever there was a time to take a pause to ensure you’ve got the right guy for the job–it is right now.
Whether one is a Republican or a Democrat, Independent or Unenrolled, this is a time for a nation to agree–that no one gets a lifetime job without a bunch of people really checking their resume. And it appears, “checking” should includes summer activities that bear on “character.” Yet, what we are learning as a nation, is that subterfuge, bombastic bluster and evasion have payed off for many who have risen to high office–it certainly did for Trump. A man who cheated on his wives and cavorted with lascivious women, discriminated against minorities as a landlord, and bragged about sexual assault–“grabbing” women by their private parts–and yet was still elected. We have to ask, As a society, how can this happen? How have we devolved? In an age with the church and evangelicals pitching their account of the path to righteousness, while condemning all that is evil–we have to ask, How can those who use the veil of religion to shroud their evil deeds induce religions’ “righteous followers” to cast their vote for them? The only answer I can fathom–is that it must be the appeal of the “con.”
Without a doubt, the “moral compass” of many individuals now seeking high office–has gone the way of the “rollodex.” And in the process of seeking office–these privilege stewards of the country club and upper society aim their “self-righteous-indignation” and their belief of “entitlement,” squarely at those who question it. If that is the new norm, we must ask, How has society failed–when these “job-seekers” evoke the name of religion for their “own” sake–and use the name of “God” with impunity to gain them absolution with those who would cast their vote of approval? Who fail to shed the shroud of wrongdoing for which they stand accused? I submit, is is pretext–pretext to obtain power and control over those, whose affiliation with God and religion is true and unwavering.
The Catholic church set the standard for using religion and their position of trust to defile innocent children–make them captors of their secrets, while preaching the dogma of the church as a Holy manifest. Is the trust imparted because society long established a belief that men of “God” do not do dastardly deeds? That paradigm has now been shattered with the abuse scandals of the Catholic church only decades later–where hidden memories emerged to flood the sanctuaries of those who shed the tears of their youth. God was not their shepherd as the church espoused but was their excuse. So heeding this lesson, what have we learned about the judicial system and those who routinely vie for our nations’ highest offices?
With the #MeToo Movement, women and some men have been speaking out at an unprecedented rate. Those who kept the “secrets” of those who abused them is giving way to the precedent of disclosure. I myself am one. After years of torment and abuse, I am speaking out. I was a victim–a victim and a prisoner whose pain has been unrequited. I understand what Dr. Christine Blasey Ford is speaking about–I understand her completely.
Whether it the threat of violence of sexual assault or both–many women have come to know this all too familiar reality. Even the courts, filled with white men in black robes–were dismissive of my plight. For me, even though the judge saw all the evidence–pictures of my battered body, medical records replete with entry after entry of years of abuse and broken bones–and heard the testimony of all those who knew me–the judge found it in his heart to hand my attacker a tissue and allow him to keep the spoils of his handiwork–a fortune he stole from me by making me a victim of abuse and recipient of scorn. Is this the type of justice women are destined in America to find when they dare to face their abuser? Is this the new American way…to “reward” those who lie, cheat and steal and abuse others with impunity so they can achieve monetary benefit or political gain?
Ever since the heart-wrenching moment where I myself fell victim of abuse did I come to know this truth. Where victims are blamed for running away to cheat death–and abusers are allowed to run rampant to cheat their victims out of their dignity, and self-respect. My personal story is heart-wrenching, but as I learn, the method is not so unique. There are multitudes of women who are victims–many like me. And many, like Dr. Christine Blasey Ford, who are speaking out to curb this epidemic of self-serving, self-anointed, elitist white men who think they are entitled to all the privileges, immunities, and powers that money and privilege can provide. They believe this because they have always led a privileged life–because of money and the power it brings. This power of “privilege” has to stop–it must stop–and will be forced to stop, as more women enter positions of power in the courts, and in our legislature–the unyielding “buck stops here” with the accountability and momentum of the #MeToo movement.
Thanks to courageous women like Dr. Ford–speaking out and naming one’s attacker–whether a priest in the Catholic Church, a pedophile congressman, or one vying for the highest office in the land–it’s time to be held accountable.
Dr. Ford is one of a handful of courageous women who dare to speak out–even though her personal privacy is sacrificed in the process. As a professor of psychology and a scientist, she no doubt understands the psyche of the self-centered, egotistical and the seemingly “entitled” narcissistic white male persona. They are the alphas who believe they are the alpha and the omega–and that those who speak out against them to threaten their dominant superiority–women–will be branded branded by these men as “stealing” what they “believe” to be their rightful inheritance of money, power or position. Yet, what these dominants ignore–is that no one is entitled to a position of trust or promotion if they are not trustworthy–no one. This is a harsh lesson that must be learned–and society as a whole must get on board–else we will continue to have “unbridled entitlement-elitists” running amuck at the expense of the “unprivileged” majority.
As for value, it seems no one puts value upon what these men have stolen from these victims–those they “chose” to make their targets. No one asks that question nor even entertains the idea of what it is like to keep a secret of abuse for decades. It is well known that victims of abuse often hold their secrets for multiple decades out of fear, embarrassment or self-blame. Just ask the victims of the Catholic church. Yet what was done by these men, was to rob the victims they “marked” as their victims–rob them of their innocence, their peace of mind, and self-worth–forever. No one has put a value on what these children and women lost–but only what the abuser becries of self-sacrifice and “inconvenience” of being held accountable. Our legal system and our government and society must now face the stark realities uncovered by the #MeToo Movement. This is not an inconvenience, this is a new era of accountability.
Our legal system and our branches of government and all those in it must face this stark reality. Just as the Catholic church, those in public office, as well as those in the public eye–we must learn this truth. Those who routinely prey upon the vulnerable will learn a new truth of accountability. Just as Dr. Ford points out her “alleged” attacker, with 100% certainty decades later–just as the victims of the Catholic clergy pointed-out those who abused their positions of trust and prayed upon the vulnerable–they will pay–there is a “new day dawning” just as Oprah Winfrey predicted. Whether it be clergy in the Catholic church–or a husband or wife who swore an oath to protect and cherish their spouse–or family members who have a duty to protect their children–it all is the same. Those in a position of trust who abrogate it, and those who want money and power and aim to acquire it–must “earn” it or be held responsible. For those who were entrusted with her well-being or those who should have been there as protectors–but those who used their position of trust to degrade and deride those who are weaker and more vulnerable–the meak will be lifted up. And those who use religion as a “pretext” to absolve them of any indicia of wrongdoing–your day has come. Those who use religion as a crucible to vie for public office, know “your” religion is nothing but pretext and your actions belie your belief. You are a fake, a fraud, and your pretext will cast you into the abyss of hell–a position you have earned by your deceit and arrogant self-aggrandization. You are not humble as the Bible demands–you are a fraud and a charlatan destined for eternal hell, condemnation and public ridicule.
Stay tuned for our upcoming program on Sexual Assault with Attorney, Activist, Author & Victim Advocate, Attorney Wendy Murphy, JD.